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Losing a parent is never easy.
I know- I lost my father one year ago this month.
Even as I write those words, I can hardly believe it. I had fallen into a rut of telling people I lost my dad six months ago. Then last week, I started getting emotional about him all of a sudden, including in dreams. That’s when it dawned on me: it was this time last year I received the call that my father went into the hospital with a brain bleed, and he never regained consciousness.
Over the past year, I’ve struggled with a lot of emotions ranging from anger to anxiety. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve picked up the phone to call my dad for advice, only to remember the reality seconds later.
It’s hard not to focus on the past after the loss of a parent:
– Every holiday reminds you of the memories they will miss out on
– Every past Facebook post that shows up in your feed brings back moments you can’t recapture
– Every time I go to make a major purchase, I try to imagine how he would handle himself
Perhaps what haunts me most is the fear that I didn’t learn enough about him, his history and the generations of our family that came before me.
But if I’m honest about looking at those fears… (read the full post on FaithGateway.com)